Disappointments, time and time again

People keep disappointing me
time and time again
Not sure how to deal
with the release of
this negative energy
circling through my body
wanting to slam
something
someone
but you can't
you're not supposed to do so
so you hurt yourself
phisically
mentally
both

the scratches are still there
they remind me
of all the time
i had to free this negative
energy
inside my body
by hurting
my outside.

it's nothing serious
i can't do without
but that pain
feels good
it makes me feel alive
and it frees me
from this negative energy
caused
by disappointments
in others
time and time again.